I’ve struggled a lot with perfectionism. Not what other people would find “perfect”. It’s a deep programmed expectation of “doing well”. And so many of us have it.
We start saying to ourselves how we “should” do things. I “should” work on this project all day. I “should” clean my house. I “should” make better choices. Should’s create a lot of drama in the mind because you’re experiencing cognitive dissonance. The desire to do something you “shouldn’t” do, instead of the thing you “should”.
Personally, I like to live my life more intuitively. I’ve always been averse to scheduling, especially my downtime.
So, basically, this month got away from me. I didn’t schedule things like I felt I “should”. In turn, I experienced a lot of things I wouldn’t have (like my trip to PR or the Iron Maiden show this past weekend).
So here’s how I stay productive and still live my damn life…
Did you know that everything is optional? Making dinner. Optional. Cleaning your house. Optional. Paying your bills. Completely OPTIONAL.
Now, there are always CONSEQUENCES to our actions. Let’s not forget that. But if we genuinely hate something, we don’t HAVE to do it.
Here’s how I reconcile this...
I hate not having internet. So, I CHOOSE to pay my internet bill. See how I chose to do that. I didn’t HAVE to do it. When I CHOOSE to do it, I don’t stress about it.
Let’s do another one. I HATE doing laundry. I CHOOSE to not do it. My husband does. Why? Because he doesn’t hate doing it. When he CHOOSES not to, we don’t have clean clothes. He HATES not having clean clothes. I, on the other hand, have many, many more clothes than him. I have clothes that he can’t wash so I send it to the cleaners. He CHOOSES to do the laundry and I CHOOSE not to.
See how there’s a difference? Can you feel the difference in your body, choosing and not choosing to do something? It feels awesome! And I don’t have to have any more drama about either.
2. When it’s on the calendar, it’s NON-NEGOTIABLE.
For the things I CHOOSE not to live without, I schedule. This is an amendment to my previous statement. I don’t necessary LIKE to schedule things but if the consequence is not in favor of what I want, it outweighs the “not liking”.
Here’s how I schedule things:
If I have, “Clean toilets” on Wednesday at 12 pm. I clean my damn toilets. If someone calls me and says, “Hey Meg! I have tickets to this thing!” or a client asks, “I need to reschedule my appointment for Wednesday at 12 pm”. I say “Nope, sorry. I have to clean my toilets. How about 12:15 pm?”
Why is this so important?
Because it creates belief in yourself. It creates TRUST that you’ll follow through with your word. When you believe that you’ll do what you say you’ll do when you say you’ll do it, there’s no drama about it. It gets done efficiently.
And trusting yourself is the MOST IMPORTANT thing you can do build a positive body image long-term.
Multi-tasking is a farce. You can’t do it. It’s actually mentally and physically impossible to give two or more tasks equal attention at the same time. When we’re talking about productivity, our brains HAVE to focus on one thing at a time.
The cognitive and emotional distress that multi-tasking creates is rarely ever seen as detrimental because the perception is generally that we’re getting shit done, fighting boredom, and moving through our lists at greater speed. BUT remember that 50-70% I chucked in the Fuck-it Bucket? Those are the tasks that we generally keep and smash into our days while trying to complete the larger tasks.
Additionally, task performance decreases every time we do more than one thing at once. So that important task is not only getting about 50% of your ability while the other efforts are just…that’s right….MORE MIND DRAMA!
If you spend 100% of your potential on ONE THING AT A TIME without adding other non-sense to the mix, you can save yourself time, money, drama, stress, guilt…OH! And do more fun shit! Like me!
(And if you HAVE to have something else on your mind while doing ONE THING, turn on some music. Like good music. Here’s an article from The New York Timesabout it…)
Perfectionism and “staying busy” are the ultimate false prophets in our culture. Idolizing a crazed existence doesn’t make you a better person, employee, parent, partner, or friend. It doesn’t even make you more productive!
So, revamp your to-do list, do the minimum, outsource the rest, and enjoy your summer, friend!
...because soon it will be...
P.S. If you haven't check it out, the NEW Body Posi Blueprint program is here!!
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