Do you ever experience repetitive thoughts? Anxiety producing obsession over worst-case scenario? A deep need to be proactive and prepared for anything?
Rumination is the primordial blend of primitive self-preservation, negativity bias, and mental efficiency.
I like to call it the Soylent Green our minds because it’s the constant recycling of spoiled emotional waste. Each cycle becoming more and more rotten and perverse.
What I find most nefarious about rumination is it being the gateway to creating our beliefs.
Beliefs are created when you think something over and over again.
This is a hard pill to swallow for some, especially my “logical” friends.
They want to tell me they don’t choose their thoughts.
They can’t “control” how they think or feel about something. Their thoughts are just “who they are”.
They want to argue with me.
They want to “prove” me wrong.
It creates a lot of resistance in their body. I see it as they defend their thoughts to me. They feel frustrated.
Sometimes they yell!
Sometimes they get flushed in the face or feel tightness in their chest. It creates a lot of uncomfortable sensations in their body when they believe I’m wrong.
They want to save me. To win. To be “right”.
I bet you have felt like this at some point when you defend a belief.
I bet you’ve even said to yourself, “See! (referring to external proof). This is why (insert thought) because (insert proof of thought)”.
Here’s how our minds create beliefs:
...And so on until we’ve embedded the thought so deeply into our minds, we don’t have to keep finding more proof.
Sometimes it’s embedded so deep that it’s now intertwined into our identity.
Really, this is just a neurological tripwire to improve our overall efficiency.
Surprisingly, it’s what our brains are supposed to do so we don’t have to constantly be proving things right or wrong, over and over again.
But what I find so fascinating about this process is that most of what we are processing in this way is completely SUBJECTIVE material. Meaning our minds are trying to prove or disprove a perception.
There is no “right” or “wrong”.
So when choosing to ruminate on things by not understanding or disrupting this underlying process, we subconsciously feel powerless over our lives.
We start to "believe" we are at the effect of whatever comes our way. We teach our brains to deal with things instead of doing the work to create our reality.
We go into fight or flight mode to defend the same wonky-ass thoughts and beliefs that are the underlying cause of our discomfort.
We teach our minds (and our family, partners, children etc.) to also "believe" we are not in charge of literally the only fucking thing we have control over! Our internal life.
My friend, I know how this all sounds. We’ve heard (over and over) that things MAKE us feel certain ways. We’re taught that people can MAKE us do or say things by doing and saying things to us.
And hey, maybe that’s the proof you’ve collected all these years for giving up your power to the outside world.
Here’s what I’d like to offer you:
Click HERE and let me know what specific situation(s) feel out of control to you and I’ll coach you. FOR FREE. Seriously, no strings attached. Just real honest-to-goodness value for you.
I promise if I don't help figure it out, you can tell me to "Fuck off!" like all my other logical friends ;)
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